The thing with humans, we are prone to wear and tear. And it is unfortunate that my years of allowing myself good food is slowly catching up on me. Sigh! My belief in “You Only Love Once” is not suiting me fine right now. So I’ll try to be a good girl for a while and chomp rabbit food, and faithfully drink prescription medicines that were initially designed for elder people. I will beat you uric acid and cholesterol!

The beginnings of asthma

I am sad that my bunso does not seem to be made of tougher stuff like her ate. While she’s so charming and lively, she gets sick more often than not. We always have to bring her to the doctor apart from the required check ups. Last weekend, after a bout of cough, shortness of breathing warranted another trip to the clinic. I literally saw my younger self as I watched her catch her breath, with shoulders high and a deep gap between her collarbones broke through. I knew the signs, have lived them for the most part of my childhood. Maxine, unfortunately, has an early onset of asthma 😦

Poor kid. She had to be nebulized at the clinic, and we even had to buy one of our own for home use. Sigh. It was always so hard living a life of asthma. We are hoping this goes away quickly and doesn’t hound her as she grows up.


My poor baby

Of all the times that you have to get sick, and to spend time at the hospital at that, is when I am thousands of miles and several hours’ worth of flying time away.


I couldn’t imagine the pain and trauma you went through. Mommy wished with all her heart that she was with you. Despite being in beautiful, new places I should have enjoyed, I was thinking of you and praying with all my might for God’s healing hands to touch you. I am glad that you are beyond okay now. I am happy that Ate Mischa never had to experience this, and I hope it won’t happen to you ever again. Poor you, poor Daddy who had to take care of you by himself, poor Ate who still have school to contend with. But thank God for Ninong, Mama and Lolo.

Horrible influenza

Mothers would always say that her heart breaks whenever she has a sick child. That is exactly how I felt for about a week when Maxine was bogged down by a horrible flu virus. Good Lord! I am blessed to have two relatively healthy kids who seldom get sick, but when they do, ugh! I would have gladly traded places with them and bear all the pain they have. So disheartening to see.

Maxine had on and off low-grade fever that lasted for six days. Towards the middle of her bout with flu, she stopped eating and drinking milk. And because the fever just wouldn’t go away, there was always the threat of dengue hanging over our heads. When we brought her to the doctor, she had to undergo some blood tests for platelet count. It was a real agony for me. Her wails as she was restrained by two medical technologists and as the needle struck her skin was almost more than I could bear. My poor baby 😦



Thank goodness she’s doing loads better now. She’s lost a lot of weight but slowly her appetite’s going back to normal. Her energy is almost up. I missed her giggles and baby talk.

They say here in the Philippines that ganyan talaga pag malapit na ang birthday. I was just relieved it was nothing serious and it’s over now. Excited for her first birthday celebration this weekend!

Bone jarring pain

Have been in so much pain, literally, for than a month now, because of my teeth. And I mean, real, bone-jarring, boring-into-your-skull kind of pain. And I thought my tolerance for pain is quite high. But I succumbed and admitted defeat to this kind of pain. I wished I was back in the O.R. delivering my twelfth baby. I was calling all the saints I knew. The pain was that bad. I often saw red, especially at night. It unilaterally affected me running my household and performing my duties at work.

So I finally trooped to our neighborhood dentist. Only to be checked on by what I consider an incompetent dentist who chopped off my silver amalgam and replaced it with a new one. I thought the devil got me there and dragged me to hell. Maybe that was how being burned alive felt like. I thought my eyes rolled back to my head a couple of times. I thought maybe I should have prepared my last will and testament. It was that BAD.

Yet, there was no relief. If anything, the hell-like pain doubled a thousand times. This was akin to Bella Cullen’s experience as she shifted from mortal to immortal.

So I went and sought my childhood dentist. And my going back to her was such a blessed relief. She ordered a panoramic xray of my mouth even prior to my visit. And she immediately knew what to do.


Looks terrible doesn’t it? All that source of pain found in three impacted teeth and that molar that maybe needs a root canal.

I had my first oral surgery two days ago. The actual operation was done and over with in thirty minutes or maybe less. The anticipation was worse and I was just relieved that it was all over. Now I have a swollen cheek to show for it, and some toothache that is more manageable.

Just two more to go.

Good God. Giving birth is definitely more tolerable.

What’s up with us

It has been a month since my last post. Things got a little crazy and roughsince the first week of May, hence the lone post last month. My writing may have gone a little rusty, but I wonder if anyone cares.

The thing is, I lost a child (more on this next time if I ever find the inclination to talk and write about it 😦 ).

Before that, the husband got hospitalized two days before I turned 34. He had chest pains in the middle of the night. I watched in agony as he writhed in pain wondering if I would be a widow at this young age. Yes, seeing the love of your life slowly wither away even to the smallest of illnesses makes you feel the pull of mortality. It feels so unfair at a time when we should be at the prime of our lives.

I’d rather be the one who gets sick. I always seem to feel helpless whenever the hubby gets sick himself. It feels so surreal all the time, like watching a bad film you would like to turn off.

The road is getting bumpy, winding and turbulent.

Can you even imagine how I felt these past few weeks? I couldn’t even put into words the uncertainty, the anguish as we went through the hospital one after the other. It was a nightmare to say the least. Not to mention the gaping hole it left in our already dwindling finances.

Anyway I am still thankful that he left the emergency room that time almost scratch-free. It was just a bad case of costochronditis and nothing more serious. I pray to God that we all keep healthy all the time.

Go away asthma!

mThere are so many things that Mischa can inherit from me. I know we look a like so much, and I hope she gets some of my street smarts (hehe). But good Lord, I hope she doesn’t develop asthma. It’s so hard growing up with it, always short of breath, and saddled with medicines of all kinds, shapes and sizes. Unfortunately, she seems to have the beginnings of allergic rhinitis like I did when I was in elementary. She sneezes and catches colds and coughs easily. When we brought her in to the doctor, she was given anti-asthma medication, which dashed my hopes that she has stronger lungs than I. I’m still praying she outgrows this.