In a parallel universe, I would have been a full time mom, and a driver to boot. It would have been my honor to cater to the every (literal) need of the kids. However, because I have to eke out a living, I treasure moments when I do have the opportunity to bring them to and from school (though the opportunity is not that ideal because I was just on leave because the grandma is sick).
I went back to Aklan after a year to continue one of our advocacies for the local government unit. Last time, I went here and didn’t have time to go to one of the province’s famed attraction, the Bakhawan Eco-Park. A visit to the latter deserves maybe a whole afternoon depending on how much time you want to spend at its penultimate spot. Though I wasn’t much of hiking/nature kind of gal, I enjoyed myself here. Located at New Buswang, one of the coastal barangays of the capital town of Kalibo. The wide expanse of mangrove forest was a rehabilitation project in the 1990s, and has saved the townspeople from floods and other effects of strong typhoons.
It was a long trek on a man-made wooden pathway spanning a little more than a kilometre. One would pass by mud crab and fish pens, and acres of mangroves. Every few hundred meters or so are sheds with benches where one can catch their breaths or just enjoy the stillness of it all. There is a even a camp site for those who wish to pitch tents and spend the night there. I and some of my colleagues who were with me enjoyed the leisurely walk while listening to sounds of chirping birds and crickets. What made my heart jump for a few minutes was the rickety wooden bridge we had to cross to get over the other side of the river cutting through the forest. Nyay!
But the view of the sandbar and the open sea beyond more than made up my moments of anxiety! God’s creation never fails to amaze! We spent a good half hour just sitting on huts just enjoying the breeze and waves as they splashed the shoreline. As it was getting dark, we made our way back as dusk was slowly creeping its way in.
Despite the minor nuisance in my life, someone will always, always love you and your craziness. I am normally uneasy about these kinds of activities, because I get stressed if things get too awkward, but it always ends up okay, and then I become thankful again. I’m sorry Lord God for the doubts and self-pity. Thank you for the constant reminder that You are by side and above me and all the things I constantly worry about.
I’m going through something but I will not sully my blog with the unpleasant details. I am just thanking the good Lord that I am alive, my family is healthy, we have food on the table, I have a respectable job that pays the bills, I was able to enroll my two kids for next school year, and so on and so forth for my immense blessings.
More importantly, I am 38 and kicking!
I miss having my mama around. I am 37 years old, married, with two precocious kids, paying mortgage for a house, hold a quite important position at work, and I am pining for my mama like a 5-year old.
I am telling you that I can and will survive on my own. I can make food, I can ride public transport, I can wash and iron clothes, etc. etc. But I miss mama’s presence at home. Just the presence. That there is an extra pair of eyes watching over my kids.
I am a wife and a mother, but I am still a daughter.
It was a sabbatical again of sorts for our family. One after the other, my dad and I went under the knife in the name of health. While both of our conditions were not immediately life threatening, we both decided that prolonging keeping abnormal growths in our bodies would not do any of us any good.
I was the reluctant patient. I have had this myoma, or at least I have known about it, since I got pregnant with Mischa. And it’s not getting smaller, nor going away at all. Since it is beginning to affect other parts of my body, plus I haven’t lost the prego look because of my bulging tummy, we decided to bid it goodbye. The operation was even more painful, and even more expensive, but I am glad because I am now okay.
Dad, on the other hand, was kinda raring to have his brain surgery after we found out he has meningioma, a non-cancerous type of tumor in the brain. We were all afraid because, hello, it is the brain that’s affected, and we were majorly concerned about him undergoing the surgery and the recovery after. And as with mine, he is doing better, and is also now okay.
Thank you Lord.